Z/Web

Author: Bruce Feirstein

Director: Roger Spottiswoode

Not quite as flat as I remember in the theatre, this Bond film nevertheless fails to deliver. It’s hard to point to any single flaw: the remote control car chase is weak, the motorcycle stunt goes on way too long, the villain isn’t particularly scary, the plot (a media baron tries to start a war between England and China to give his new 24/7 news network something to broadcast) is ridiculous (even for a Bond movie), the line gags are so obvious as to literally gag you, and the women aren’t really around (Teri Hatcher dies right away and Michelle Yeoh’s character made a great foil for Bond, but she’s too buff to be romantic). It’s a strange film where nothing works. I never thought I’d find a Bond film boring, but here’s the one.

Author: Ronald Bass (story) and Michael Hertzberg

Director: Jon Amiel

This was supposed to be a disappointing movie, but I got exactly what I expected: basically Sean Connery and Catherine Zeta-Jones looking gorgeous and committing cool high-tech robberies. Sure, it’s not deep, and plot was swiss cheese, but it was fun and completely harmless.